My solace

Every morning I wake up with a hope of achieving something, discovering something new, meeting new people and getting my tasks done. All I have in mind is what needs to be done and the instant I start compiling the “To Do” list, I feel a surge of nervousness running at the back of my brain. It’s a feeling so ambiguous and impossible to explain. The fear of getting a long list of things done overcomes the ecstasy of waking up at a new day, ignoring the ray of the light of the dawn that morning. The joy of being blessed with another day to cherish blissful moments and to confess to people around how much I care about them. A moment later I find myself pulling up my jeans and getting ready for the day rushing here and there to get things in order. And after all that battering and yelling I leave my house and get to where I should be. There are times when my days start terrific and end extraordinary and there are days when things don’t go the way I plan. At times I experience moments of life long learning, witness unforgettable moments and achieve planned objectives. I return home with a feeling of satisfaction and completeness. But there are times when I return home all disappointed and frustrated. Times when commencements do not reach their destined ends. And those are the times when I need people. People who I yelled at the same morning; to console me, to show unconditional love, to bestow me with just a couple of moments of their precious time, or to just listen to my miseries and woes and lend a shoulder to cry on. And there is no comparable feeling of the degree of guilt and grievance in this world after that. I realize how things are ripping apart. How I’m taking them for granted - the people that I so badly need and those that I belong to. Those who I want to be there when luck is not at my side. Also at times when I want to share my moments of triumph. People to mourn, celebrate and share my life with. And even when I’ll feel like a loser, they will be there. My real and long term achievement is retaining what I already have – my solace, my FAMILY!